Motherhood: A Day In The Life

It's Motherhood Monday. Today Jeanette of Mommy Needs A Martini is giving us a little glimpse into her daily (crazy) life. Jeanette is a full time mother of two and works outside the home. She coaches girls youth softball, is active in her church and enjoys spending time with her family. In her free time, Jeanette blogs about her adventures in motherhood and wonderfully hilarious crafting attempts (and fails) at Mommy Needs A Martini . You can also follow Jeannette on Facebook , or on Twitter and of course on Pinterest. I happen to know that Jeannette has an awesome relationship with her dad (and he's pretty damn funny) See here.

I’m three and a half years into this gig called Motherhood. In that time, I have learned that I have so much more to learn, but I’ve also learned that my patience and compassion levels have increased tenfold compared to pre-baby me. There are many times during our hectic days that I want nothing more than to curl up in a ball and hide in a closet. But there are many more times when I can’t get enough of the laughing and loving and memories being made.

 

A typical day in our house starts before the sun is up. You know what? I’ll just break it down for you:

 

530am – I wake up, rush to get ready, sometimes forgetting deodorant just so I can pee alone before the kids wake up.
545am – 3yo wakes up, usually singing loud for all to hear and waking everyone within 3 blocks of our house.
6am-630am – 3yo is dressed, hair done, baby doll dressed, some unknown crisis is dealt with and/or avoided, a new favorite cartoon is discovered, her shoes don’t match, her skirt isn’t princess-y enough and her hair is too tight. I eventually am able to divert with a snack while I wake up the 1yo.
630am-645am – 1yo is dressed, hair brushed, shoes on and she’s giggling. This is my brief moment of clarity for the day.
645am-700am – Daycare/Preschool drop-off. Hugs, kisses, tears, more hugs, being introduced to friends for the eleventy thousandth time, more kisses, waves through the window, promises are made to return with more hugs, teacher diversion successful, I exit stage left.
700am-730am – I drive to work in complete silence. Instead of crawling into a closet
730am-400pm – Work. Sometimes mind numbing, sometimes exciting. Mostly just work. And a paycheck.
415pm-445pm – I drive to daycare with the music at 11 and sing like a loon.
445pm-515pm – Daycare pick up. There is crying, some screaming, a lot of No’s being thrown around, a trip to the potty, a sudden switch to adorable as art work is proudly displayed, hugs and goodbyes to all the friends, a quick turn to Tantrum Town because, why not. Tears ensue over jacket requirements, or opening the door too quickly, or not walking slow enough or just because they feel like it.
515pm-6pm – I make a feeble attempt to wind the kids down, try to keep them engaged but not stimulated, sing songs and tell stories, they have afternoon snack while I make dinner, I feed the dogs, clean up from the morning rush, prepare for bath and bedtime, make lunches for the next day, try to accomplish some sort of cleaning (laundry, sweeping, dishes). All the while still singing so they don’t notice me searching for the nearest corner to hide.
6pm-630pm – We’re back in Tantrum Town.
630pm-7pm – Both kids have finally eaten dinner and are usually whining to be held, at the same time. Or they’re pooping, at the same time.
7pm-715pm – DADDY’S HOME! MOMMY RUNS!
715pm -730pm – Mommy’s back. Daddy needs a break. No, I’m not kidding.
730pm-8pm – Bath and clean-up time.
8pm-930pm – The longest, most ridiculously painstaking bedtime routine in the history of all the lands takes place.
930pm-1015pm – Time to wash dishes (again), clean up toys (again), lay out clothes for the next day, prep dinner for the next day, make a list for tomorrow of things I forgot to do today. Sometimes I cry from exhaustion or frustration and let the running sink drown it out. Sometimes I giggle out loud and make my husband question my sanity.
1015pm-11pm – I fight to keep my eyes open so I can enjoy mindless social media time while watching mindless television.
11pm – I crash. HARD.

(Some, ok MOST, nights…)

2am – The 1yo is awake.

330am – The 3yo is awake.

4am – They’re both back to sleep.

530am – My alarm goes off. AGAIN.

 

After the tantrums and the whining and the begging and the pleading and after the praying for bedtime and hoping they sleep all night, I truly am amazed by how big my heart grew when my two little girls came into this world. Even if it’s a simple giggle or a tight hug around my leg or that last “I love you” of the day, it’s all worth it. Motherhood has been one (mis)adventure after another and I can’t wait for more.

 

My Promise To Little Girls Everywhere

I feel like every time I watch or read the news I learn about yet another young girl being raped. As if the crime of rape isn’t bad enough these young girls have to deal with all of this in an age of technology where word spreads fast along with pictures and videos, text messages, tweets, Facebook status updates etc. It’s awful. It makes me sick.

If you follow my blog you already know I have two boys. I can’t tell you have often I hear; oh boys are so much easier, be happy you have boys. I have always found this to be a weird statement. First of all I would be lying if I didn’t tell you I would love a daughter to throw into the mix of our family no matter how hard girls may actually be. Secondly why, why are girls so much harder? Okay take away the obvious reasons of clothes, PMS and attitude, but I think raising kids these days whether boys or girls is hard, if you are doing it right.

Rape like any crime bears the question of how do we prevent it? How do we fix this seemingly growing problem and protect our girls and women from it ever happening to them? I can’t claim to know the solution but as the mother of two boys I am writing this letter to young girls everywhere and I sure do hope it helps.

Dear Little Girls everywhere,

I am a mom. I was once a little girl who grew into an awkward teenager and eventually into a confident woman. I am now a mom of two young boys. If I do nothing else right in this life I promise you this:

 I promise to raise two boys into men who respect you. I promise to teach them to protect you from those who may not always respect you. I promise to teach them to lead rather than follow. To know right from wrong and to stand up for you no matter how scary it may be to do so. I promise to teach them that taking or sharing inappropriate pictures, videos or rumors about you is wrong and that the camaraderie they may feel with their male peers for mere minutes or hours will never compare to the lack of sleep they will have for the rest of their lives knowing how wrong this decision was.

I will teach them that it only takes one wrong decision to completely alter the outcome of your life. They will know that it is never okay to laugh at your expense or to ignore your need for help in order to protect their reputation.  I will teach them that their mother was once a young girl just like you and that hurting you would be like hurting me. I will teach them that love is real, and when it’s real it is awesome. I will teach them that they deserve love just like you deserve love. I will teach them that love does not exist without respect. I will teach them to hold doors open for you, and to look you in the eyes when they speak to you. I will teach them to never even think about beeping a car horn for you but to instead get out of the car go up to the door and meet your parents. I will teach them to call you to ask you out on a date instead of sending a text message. I will teach them that talking to you like one of the guys is the best way to ruin any kind of love that could have grown between you.

I promise to teach them that you can in fact be friends (and you should be) and your love will be so much better for it. I will teach them to allow you to be you and never make you feel like you have to be someone else.  I will tell them that no matter what you say, if you have been drinking they are not to touch you in any inappropriate way. They are to bring you home and tell you to sleep well.

I will teach both of my boys that girls are not objects, but human beings. You are human beings who deserve to be treated with respect. You deserve to be protected and loved. I will teach them that one day they may have a daughter and what they do now will affect them later.

I promise I will do my part as a mother of boys to make sure that rape is not okay. I will raise boys into men who know that in no way shape or form is a criminal act upon you okay EVER. I promise I will raise two boys who your father will be happy you are dating. Trust me this in and of itself is huge. I will never stop teaching them all of this and I hope that all parents of boys will step up and do the same.

Sincerely,

A dedicated mother of boys