Tuesday, March 31, 2015

10 Quotes from my son that scare the crap out of me

Today I am honored to have Clint Edwards of  No Idea What I'm Doing: A Daddy Blog as my guest. If you don't know him you should head over to his blog and get to know him. Clint was nice enough to have me over on his site on Friday. We may have gotten into our first fight over my bio ( I tend to go on and on and on) but we worked it out (meaning he cut the crap out of it) and we have moved on to making friendship bracelets for each other. Today he's sharing with us 10 things his son says that scare the crap out of him. (I bet we all have one of these lists)
Clint Edwards is the author of No Idea What I’m Doing: A Daddy Blog. He lives in Oregon. Follow him on Facebook and Twitter.

My son is 7. He says a lot of things that make we worry about his future, his motivations, and his hygiene. Here are a few examples.

Me: When was the last time you changed your underwear?
Tristan: I don’t know. A week or something. I don’t understand why this is a big deal.

Me: Why do you keep peeing on the floor?
Tristan (shrugs): Because it’s funny.

Me: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Tristan: A scientist, Pokémon Trainer, or a guy that beats people up for money.

Me: Why didn’t you clean your room?
Tristan (somber scary face): Because it’s where I hide… things.

Tristan: Can you help me make a Minecraft YouTube video? I want to be like StampyLongNose.

Me: Bath night.
Tristan: (Long. Agonizing. Moan.)

Me: Calm down. You’re acting like a drug addict.
Tristan: If drugs are like sugar then that sounds fun.

Tristan: You have to be pretty old to be a dad. Like 16.

Tristan (pointing at man pushing grocery cart full of empty cans): Bet that guy makes A LOT of money.

Tristan: Why would someone give you a job?
Me: Because I went to college.
Tristan (laughing): College.

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